why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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