Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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