Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
