She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
