Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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