thus making me awesome and them whores
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize