I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
