Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
