belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Do vagina's smell?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
