It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
