K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize