she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize