i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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