my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
