HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Randomize
