party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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