When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
