I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
