Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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