Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
