Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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