Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize