I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
