I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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