Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
