So drunk, too bad you don't want this
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
