Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
