school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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