He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize