eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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