he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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