you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize