you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
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