I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
