She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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