I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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