STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
