i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
