You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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