Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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