I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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