it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
