Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.

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(301): View more from Maryland

he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.

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(314): View more from Missouri

sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire

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(949): View more from California

You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome

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(626): View more from California

I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.

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(516): View more from New York

The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.

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(305): View more from Florida

He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore

(941): View more from Florida

That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore

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