If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize