do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
