just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You dont lie about slip and slides
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Randomize
