At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize