He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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