YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I think i got beer on your cat.
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