I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize