i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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