what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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